"..So here
I am
Don't know
how to
say this.
The only
thing I
know is
awkward
silence.."

a short Fuck You to all my readers - 04.27.2004//7:38 pm

You people are no fucking help. I turn to this diary for support and get absolutely no feedback. I hate it sometimes. I haven't heard from anyone in a VERY long time except for Kate, Patsy, and sometimes Maya. Thank you 3, I really appreciate it. But it's not necessary now. I hope I don't offend you 3.

I can't take my life. I can't take life in general. I'm going to snap. I can't deal with people's bullshit any fucking longer!

I made out with Cole Friday night. I made out with Spencer last night, I've only seen the guy twice. I can't take my supposed friends acting shocked and repulsed when I tell them this. I can't take my supposed friends calling me a whore to my face. I can't take it because I don't like these guys. I don't even know if I like shane. I just need someone. I am so fucking clingy and bitchy and I hate myself.

I can't keep doing drugs. I need them though. I need to feel the pot in my lungs. I've smoked weed at least once a day 14 out of the past 15 days. I NEED it. If I quit I will lose all my friends. But I can't keep doing it. Fucking a.

There is nothing in my life worth living for. Seriously. I know this sounds teen angsty, but fuck you all. None of you care about me anyway. You don't fucking know me. And, sadly, none of the people I know IRL do either.

I'm sorry to have been a bother to you all. Sorry that I wasted bandwith on this fucking diary.

<<< lost && looking >>>

Closing the door, once and for all - 07.25.2004
random crap, and yes I suck. - 07.20.2004
fuck everyone - 07.18.2004
On Religion - 07.12.2004
Getting it all out - 07.11.2004